Alternate title: Cinematic Horror.

Good. God. Worst. Movie. Of. The. Year. Perhaps the Decade.

Added treat. Sitting in front of some…well, clone of the neanderthal in the movie who thought the film was high-larious. Bellowing guffaws at (all AND ONLY) the grossest parts. And, oh, there are many.

At one moment I thought: this is the kind of movie you hope your mother doesn’t know you were at.

At one point, Katherine asks Gerald why he loves her–for a second, I thought he was going to say “Because the script makes me!” NO other reason.